“Throughout nature, growth involves periodic accelerations and transformations: things go slowly for a time and nothing seems to happen— until suddenly the eggshell cracks, the branch blossoms, the tadpole’s tail shrinks away, the leaf falls, the bird molts, the hibernation begins. With us it is the same. Although the signs are less clear than in the world of feather and leaf, the function of transition times are the same.”
“Whether you chose your change or not, there are unlived potentialities within you, interests and talents that you have not yet explored. Transitions clear the ground for new growth. They drop the curtain so the stage can be set for a new scene. What is it, at this point in your life, that is waiting quietly backstage for an entrance cue?”
The way of transition
One of the interesting things about transition is the way it descends on us unexpectedly. The morale is: Focus less on whether an event is good or bad, but whether or not it involves an important change of life for you. And don’t be worried if the event seems relatively inconsequential; it may merely be the most obvious symbol of change, when there are deeper rumblings in the psychological ground beneath.
The only constant is change
One of the messages of transition is that we can’t be the same person doing the same thing all our life.
To have a new beginning you need to acknowledge an ending. We all have different styles when it comes to coping with an ending, but each ending may reawaken old hurts or feelings of shame.
When do we make our great new start? Beginnings can often only be seen in retrospect—they don’t seem impressive at the time. We meet someone who ends up being our spouse at a party we didn’t want to go to, we happen to open a book at a friend’s place that changes us for ever.
When we are ready to move on, opportunities will appear and it will be an exciting time. But be easy on yourself and maintain at least some form of continuity with your old life. Fresh with your insights from limbo time, don’t be too disheartened if things don’t move as quickly as you would like.
In a nutshell
All life transitions have a pattern, which if acknowledged will make tough times more comprehensible.